You Know What We Need?
We need to figure out what to make of the next 1,826 days -- history -- voodoo -- Radio -- candor -- flora -- Luck -- sexy time -- We need to get back to writing, journalizing & corresponding -- We need to yell our passion for goggle tans -- But keep to Attention & Good Manners -- And always have a big towel, your train whistle, a sharpie & the gumption to build a pillow fort -- Zacolique, KatuStarcraft, Life in the Face & La Maison Rose -- Don't forget winter, not to mention actual snow please -- Rockies -- map -- catalogues -- Blizzards -- Canon G10 -- Vitamin b12 -- We certainly do need to share more -- And read more fiction!
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Today was a good day. It ended in the snowy woods of Montée Ryan as I arrived at the condo. My home mountain arouses many memories of arriving here.
Once, on a regular Friday night family trek to Tremblant, we came across a ghost deer on the edge of the wood. It’s albino fur was splashed white and its eyes were red. It just stared at us. Then this autumn, on a regular rep trek to home base 2123, dad & I saw a green light in the sky. We pulled off near the Golf Manitou to watch aurora borealis shimmer faintly over the mountains. It just waved at us.
Once I rear-ended a taxi van that took too long to turn left on Chemin Clément. Forgot you couldn’t pass there because snow hid the lines. The driver really did take too long to turn though. It just sat there waiting for me.
I’m telling you all these things because I can’t share with my dad what a good day I had. Spent all morning showing in Lachine, then boomed over to Laval to drop off a catalogue and ended up showing there. Really didn’t want to unpack ten garment bags of samples a second time in two days but the work felt like clockwork. Like something I’d done many times.
I left with an order! All I wanted to do was hold down the number 7 speed dial to tell my bossman father about my success. Then I remembered I couldn’t. And I felt a great emptiness… Would have equally liked to confess my misplacing his Merlin Four’s on Saturday, hours before his commemoration party. What a fucking fool. I remembered where I’d left them once I got back to Ottawa and cursed myself.
So I carried that emptiness through fresh snow into the village tonight and I started to run. The abandon followed. It was a fool’s hope anyway, but I ran harder. Then I came to the rack, knowing it would be as empty as my heart. And bright as fire, there were my dad’s ancient K2 skis.
They’d just sat waiting there for me.
There, I left my emptiness and carried my father home.
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destinationsert liked this
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aprilnotavril said:
There was a long stretch when something would happen and I’d immediately think, “I need to call Dad and tell - oh.” It’s hard but eventually I found joy in thinking of what he would have replied.
I’m thinking of you.
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